One Year

How should I feel, what should he be doing.  This is new and I don't know how to approach it at this point.  A year has come and gone.  We fought the weekend before and the day before.  I caught him keeping secrets again.  Yesterday was a year and we both had to work.  He cuddled me at night.  I said its officially been a year.  His response was yes it has.  It would have been nice if he said I am glad we made it.  He didn't.  He hardly ever uses words. He seems to be focused on other things right now, predominately bodybuilding.  I thought maybe I should speak up.  I always speak up.  It annoys him, I know.  He did ask if I was okay.  I said yes.  I lied.  I don't know what this should look like.  Does it require more attention or is it better to let sleeping dogs lie.  for now I stay on hold. Silent, swallowing my screaming internal voice.  I don't know if she is right or wrong.  Its scary and frustrating.  Sometimes life just sucks more than I want it to.